How do you know if your a red neck?
You go to the family neuron to find a date!
Yo mamma so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping out her basement window.
Yo mamma so fat, every time she turns around its her b-day!!!
Sam: Would you punish me for some thing i didn't do?
Teacher: no, of course not.
Sam: good, because i didn't do my homework.
What is green and smells?
Hulk's fart.
Why did the elephant bring toilet paper to a party?
Becase he was a party pooper.
How many Conservative economists does it take to change a lightbulb ?
None. The invisible hand does it.
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